Uncertainties

They say ‘Life and magic begins outside of your comfort zone’, I couldn't agree more. Thing is, it’s as simple as stepping out of the door, driving out of that city or town you're so familiar with then taking a route you've never taken before. That's when you’ll realize that there's just so much to see, learn, and experience -- outside of this little claustrophobic bubble we're all living in. My little escapade started about 6 months ago, I went to the United States to pay my mom a visit since we have not seen each other for quite a while. I've been to a few other countries outside of the Philippines (my motherland) but my travels have [so far] been restricted within Asia, it's my second time to set foot in the west so naturally I was a bit scared [an understatement] and anxious but nevertheless -- happy, since I'll finally be able to spend time with my mom after so many years. It was a bit nerve-racking at first considering that my mother and I have not spend time together for God knows when, it's pretty hard for someone like me to recall what it’s like to have a mom look after you and tend to your daily needs since -- for the last God knows when. My dad's always been the one to do those things for us. Well, in his case, his employees or our housemaids. It's all cool though, I love my life, no complaints at all. Besides, I missed having a mom, seeing someone cook breakfast for me, go shopping, and do other girly stuff with. It's a prayer that God has definitely answered, and for that, I am utterly thankful. When my plane landed in LAX, it gave me so much feels. I'm finally outside of bustling Manila, of Asia! Everything was just so different, it was all so new to me, I was renewed as person, a sigh of relief, a breath of fresh air, the sun shining down on everything from an angle I have not witnessed before. Casting shadows everywhere so beautifully! Okay, I'm being overly-poetic, let's take it down a notch shall we? Anyway, living in O.C. for a few months made me realize that you have to work really hard and juggle multiple jobs at once in order to have the life you really want. It was such an eye-opening experience that I've realized, it is no joke living in the US. I saw how hard everyone worked, mostly my mom, I said to myself “I'm not even sure if I'm cut for this kind of life”, I wasn't certain, if I was willing to trade the kind of life I had in Manila. Then again, life isn't always about convenience, self-fulfillment is the main goal here. It’s only a matter of time before I find myself stumbling out of my comfort zone and into reality so I better suck it up and get my life, my plans sorted out same way these people do.


But ill be back. Not anytime soon, but ill be back.. maybe for good? We will see.